The Intimacy Code

inspired from the International School of Temple Arts

This is the formula I use personally — and what helped me call in a partner who actually shows up.

Formula for having the “talk” with someone you are interested in.

The more you use this, the more natural it becomes —

and the faster you know if someone's actually worth your energy.

• R - Relationship Status- are you in one? What is it? Is this ok to be connecting? What are the boundaries in your relationship? Telling the truth around it. Gender preferences. What you are open to? What are you looking for in a relationship? What style of relating do you desire- monogamous, polyamorous, etc. What are you available for right now?

• B - Boundaries- what do you want and what do they want ? Can be around time too. Any boundaries? Boundaries can change. Especially with trust.

• D - Desire - what do you both want? What is your desire in this moment? What do you want out of this?

• S - Sexual history - last tested, for what, results, etc.

• M - Meaning-  just a one night stand, want to get married, deeper connection as friends? What does this mean?

• T - Traumas- what should I know that may come up through our connection?

If it’s meant to be, it will be. You don’t need to rush it.

Post Intimacy Checkin- After Care Conversation

One or two days after intimate experience.

• What worked well? What did we like?

• What didn’t go so well?

• What could I/we do (even) better/different (looking back or next time)?

• What would we like more of?

• How do we move forward?

Want to attract the most soul-aligned relationships!?